Last October, I virtually celebrated my 80th Birthday with my husband, James, and my two best friends, Anupa and Devika.
Turning 80 certainly felt like a milestone, and that's when I realized I needed to restart my coaching practice, focusing on transforming aging. Time is getting short and is not to be wasted. The world needs us!
ARE YOU AFRAID OF AGING?
Don't read this if you are afraid of aging and only want to confront it when you take your last breath. This won’t be for you; it might make you wake up and create a life worth living.
I’ve been reading the book, “What Are Old People For?” by William H. Thomas, M.D., and he says many of the things I've come to believe (and experience) about the aging process. We both agree it is a NATURAL part of life; just like birth, childhood, adolescence, young adult, middle-aged adult, and MATURE adult (think old but without the cultural crap associated with that word).
As we age we accumulate a lifetime of insights, challenges overcome, strategies for living -- just plain wisdom -- which we now have access to as we continue to live our lives. What a splendid gift; both for ourselves and for others younger who would, given an open mind and heart, reap the benefit of our experience.
As Dr. Thomas so wisely points out, “Aging requires life...being alive is a continuous prerequisite for growing old...given a choice between aging and death, we choose to grow old.” Amen! I choose to grow old and to do it powerfully, and make it fun and fulfilling.
One of the first things I recommend is de-stressing. There’s so much going on in our lives that it’s become easier and easier to feel overwhelmed, burnt out, and SERIOUS. Sometimes it’s stress related to health issues; sometimes to relationships; sometimes to finances, you get the point.
Here are some tips to de-stress:
1- Immediately focus on the present by feeling the physical sensations in your body. Become aware of your breathing and slow it down. Six breaths in, a slight pause, and 4 breaths out work well for me.
Notice the way your body feels; hear what you hear, see what you’re seeing. If it’s pain you’re dealing with, focus on the parts of your body that feel good rather than the painful area. Being present to what is stops the mind’s negative chatter.
2- And, very important, speak kindly to the painful part and ask it what you need to do to make it better…and LISTEN. Then take the action that was indicated. I know it sounds goofy, but if you are sincere when asking and follow what you hear, it can help a lot.
3- Stop worrying. Say to your self “ I don’t need to worry now, I can worry all I want in 5 minutes”. When the 5 minutes is up, give yourself another 5. The worry cycle is usually broken after the first 5 minutes!
4- If your mind decides to focus on the problem situation anyway, see the situation resolved in the best possible way. To engage all your senses, first see what you’ll see when it is resolved, then hear what you’ll hear, and then feel how you will feel when the problem is solved.
For example, if it’s related to weight loss see yourself in a mirror looking like you want to look, hear what others will be telling you about how great you look, and feel the emotions you’ll have when you look and feel lighter!
All these steps will create a space between the “problem” and how you think about it. You’ll get new insights about how to handle it and discover new, more effective strategies to create what you want in your life.
It’s worked for me, and I’ve started to sleep better too! More on sleep in another newsletter.
COOL RESOURCE FOR SPEAKERS
We can all use some help so today I’m recommending a talented Virtual Assistant, Ms. Ray Walker. While she can handle several types of VA jobs, her superpower for assisting Speakers is her ability to help them share their message with the world. She has a talent for coordinating logistics and managing schedules, ensuring that Speakers are well-prepared and ready to deliver their presentations. She’s also skilled at creating engaging and impactful presentations, as well as helping speakers present their message in a way that resonates with their audience. Ray keeps a positive attitude while remaining calm and organized in the face of unexpected challenges, such as technical issues or last-minute changes. If you know any Speakers in need of this kind of help, contact Ray at her email, firstname.lastname@example.org, or text her at (505) 310-2827.
BY 40, OUR MIDDLE FINGER IS AT HALF-MAST…
By 50, it’s full on UP.
By 60, both of those fingers are hoisted in a V…and not a single care is given any more.
I mean, we care about our family, our friends and our passions.
We care about the environment.
We care about equality and living in peace.
But we don’t care about ‘fitting in’ and we don’t care about what people think of us.
Too many years were wasted on that.
We certainly don’t care to stay quiet, or bite our tongues – we haven’t wasted all these lessons to play dumb when the situation calls for our wisdom…
Neither do we care if our waistline is the acceptable size or if our thighs are toned and unblemished.
We have wrinkles, we have stretch marks, we have war wounds, warts and all.
And we are rocking each and every one of them in all their glory.
You see, there comes a time in every woman’s life where you realise that this is it. This is the time to be alive. To live without restriction or opression anymore.
To break free of the chains society binds us with and tear loose.
This is our time to be completely and totally who we were supposed to be along.
The sooner you get there, the better.
Life waits for no woman.
-- Donna Ashworth
From To The Women: words to live by. amzn.to/3AnaPE4
UPCOMING EXCITING EVENTS
Fellow Aging Goddesses! Get clear and make a plan for aging powerfully, passionately, and purposefully! You can do it, and I will guide you in a fun and fulfilling way without filling your journey with activities you don’t like.
It will be designed with YOU in 3 months for only $720 (a 70% discount)! Why am I offering such a gigantic discount? I need to test the Pilot for my Transform the Way You Age Group Program, and I need your feedback. This offer is limited to only 6 women, and is for a limited time so schedule a Discovery Session ASAP so we can see if it's a fit for you at https://tarufisher.coachesconsole.com/calendar .
If you know any women who would benefit from reading this, please forward it to them. And if you (or they) want to get my 10 Tips For Powerful Aging, click on this link, http://bit.ly/3XeX6IK
I'm also soliciting feedback on which topics on aging are of interest to you, so I'd love to have a Virtual Chat about your specific aging concerns. Go here to schedule, http://bit.ly/3GEKV1h
CONNECT WITH ME