These are the first new frames in over ten years, and I love them. What do you think? Let me know, taru@tarufisher.com.

When you look in the mirror and see your wrinkles, do you feel some fear about looking older? Do you feel “less than”? Do you hate them? That’s not good because they are part of you, and hating any part of you is never a good thing.

When you see another woman with visible wrinkles, do you feel sorry for her? Do you think less of her? Do you compare your wrinkles with hers?

What do wrinkles mean? Are they signs of oncoming decrepitude? Are they broadcasting “I’m old, and losing my value as a woman? Do you wish they were gone?

Well, these attitudes come from society’s skewed ideas of what women should look like to be valued. They are formed at an early age as we are encouraged to make sure we are as beautiful, or pretty, or good-looking as we can be so we are accepted and valued.

As an 81-year-old, I proudly announce my age. Why? Because I want to see people’s response, hear what they have to say, and examine my own aging biases. Currently, the responses are typically spoken with incredulity, “Why, you don’t look that old!” Or, “No way, you can’t be that old!”.

While I feel an initial thrill of happiness, it fades almost as quickly as it appears. I wonder if that person devalues their own journey of aging, and If I didn’t look as good, would I be ignored and devalued?

I have been blessed with great genes; not every woman is. I have never felt “beautiful”. I’ve been OK with being “cute”. Now I notice my reaction to other women’s wrinkles and aging bodies. And I fear they will be judged as unworthy of attention and discarded because of superficial and unrealistic attitudes.

Because I have been raised in a society that mostly values looks over intelligence, female submission over strength of character, modesty over achievement, I have to look deeply at my own biases and judgements.

And I’ve found that I have them, even subtly, and it takes becoming very still and noticing those thoughts instead of judging myself. This means I’m working on being comfortable with my own and others signs of growing older. This also means I have had to find the value in aging and toss out those ingrained attitudes learned from childhood.

Now, I’m not saying throw out your face creams, makeup, or taking care of your body. Hell, no! Do what suits YOU, what makes you feel happy. Within the past year I’ve discovered some Ayurveda skin oils and creams that I am using every day and at night. I absolutely love using them and feel good about what they do for my aging skin.

This is new for me and it’s not from a fear of looking old; it’s because I value my skin and love making it look and feel glowy. This is new for me as I’ve almost never used any makeup or skin creams. Unbelievable? Yes!

But in my Senior year in High School I was voted the girl with the best complexion. Guess what I did as my beauty routine…I washed my face with very hot water using Dove soap! Yes, that was it. And I’ve always had an aversion to putting chemicals on or in my body.

Women! No matter your “looks”, you have value, you deserve respect, and love. Do whatever beauty routine makes you feel good about yourself, even if it’s merely soap and water.

I see you as you are , and I love you, wrinkles and all. My wish for you is self-acceptance and love of self as you traverse getting older.

Ageing looks good on anyone who believes that it does.
It’s an inner light kind of deal.
It shines through skin, bone, muscle and sinew - bathing everything you see in a luminous glow of peace, acceptance and utter loveliness.
It’s some sort of chemical reaction when self-love (at last) meets Mother Nature.
Then wisdom and hindsight all join together too and cast their magic -
until what you see is a woman who has evolved, grown, learned and risen many many times.
And it’s a beautiful sight to behold.
So, age however you like because if something is not making you happy, that will show.
Time can’t erase your beauty my friend, only negativity can do that.

- Donna Ashworth

From ‘Wild Hope’

MY MENTORING PROGRAM

I've changed my program name from Coaching to Mentoring I've come to not resonate with the word "Coach," a title I've held for nearly 20 years.

As I've changed my focus to empowering women around aging, I'm feeling the need to change my "title" to Mentor. I've found that Mentorship is a relationship between two people where the mentor provides advice and guidance to their mentee to help them grow, learn, and develop skills and attitudes needed for growth.

Aging is my gig, and I've got the NLP tools, a resilient attitude, and the experience of aging myself...I am closing in on 82!

I'm offering 3-month mentoring packages, none longer. You can purchase this package at anytime, but because I'm an Elder, I may not be around to play with you, even if you want to wait to experience my Magic Mentoring. So, if you sincerely want to transform the way you age, do not wait!

Right now, I have spaces for a few 1:1 mentoring clients, so don't wait for "someday" when you have your shit together. None of us knows how long we have left in this precious body to live life full out.

Your timing is the right timing, so trust yourself to know when the time is right for YOU. I trust and respect you to make the choice that's right for you.

My website needs updating, so contact me for more information and pricing; you'll be pleasantly surprised.

My offer is either a complimentary Tarot Card Reading, a free 45-minute Virtual Call-A-Crone Chat about anything, and even a 1:1 email conversation…all at no cost or obligation. That said, given any limitations on my energy I may encounter, there will be times when I have to take care of myself first and say no.

Why am I offering this? Because some of you may not have the funds to work with me on a paid basis, and I still want to provide value for your participation in reading and responding to my Love-Letters, even if you haven't yet decided to become a paying friend.

I deeply appreciate your readership and love it if you would refer my L-L-’s to your friends and acquaintances so they may find value, too. So, if you know any women who would benefit from reading this, please forward it to them. And, if they want to get my 10 Tips For Powerful Aging, here's the link to subscribe and receive it: https://bit.ly/3RpkWQW