PERSONAL NOTE

This is a picture of the HUGE boot I've had to wear since my trip and fall on April 4th. It's bulky and uncomfortable, but necessary to allow my two broken bones to heal. Oddly enough, I have felt little to no pain this entire time! The wheelchair was no fun but necessary. The worst part has been having scary thoughts about becoming older and less capable. I had to reframe nearly everything my mind wanted to scare me with. Grrr! However, this was a blessing as I've had plenty of time to rest and reflect on what is truly important to me. It's the first time I've slowed down this much and taken the time to get my priorities straight. My focus now is making life a mystery to be lived rather than a problem to be solved.

WHAT IS BEAUTY AS WE AGE?

I recently saw a Facebook post that caused me to think about aging and beauty; what IS beauty as we age? Is traditional beauty a fair and reasonable expectation to put on women as we age?

The post was in response to 81-year-old Martha Stewart's swimsuit photo on the cover of Sports Illustrated, and she contrasted it with 106-year-old Philippine Tattoo Artist Apo, who was recently on the cover of Vogue Philippines magazine.

The author, Ava Park, had some very pertinent comments with which I resonated:

 "I feel that one reason the image of Stewart is "disturbing" for so many women is that we know, subliminally, that all of us are being deprived of our essential archetype of the Wise Woman. Apo… looks old … because she is … and nothing has been done to her to erase her age. Apo's image lets us relax into normal aging. Our civilization desperately needs our Wise Women. Let us not erase them in favor of a patriarchal impossibility sold to us for their profit, sold to us as "the ideal," so we women can expend our precious energy chasing an outward appearance, participating in our own erasure, instead of becoming the Wisewomen guiding civilization, as is right and natural."

I contemplated her comments and found I agreed with them. I have no desire to emulate Martha Stewart; none, nada, zero, zilch. And consider how much time and money it must take to maintain that youthful look. Because most of us do not have those same resources, it's much easier for Martha to attain this younger look.

This world desperately needs wise women of any age, race, looks, etc., and to elevate looks as a priority takes us away from what is essential as we age. I'm not saying let yourself go, not at all. And, while we must not fixate on continuing to look young and beautiful, we must take care of ourselves as we age and do our best to stay healthy and engaged in life to the greatest extent possible. I want to be seen as a wise elder who shares herself in service to women as they age beautifully in mind and spirit rather than as a caricature of youth. This world desperately needs our wisdom!

COOL RESOURCE 

WELL-FORMED OUTCOME QUESTIONS TO HELP YOU SET A GOAL:

1. What specifically do you want? What is the desired outcome? Make sure your goal is stated in the positive.
2. How will you know when you've achieved what you want? What evidence will you have? How will you measure your progress? What will you see, hear, and feel when you achieve your outcome?
3. When, where, and with whom do you want to achieve your goal?
4. What stops you from having your desired outcome already? Identify and explore any negative feelings, thoughts, beliefs, or circumstances that seem to get in the way of you achieving your goal.
5. What resources will you need to help you create what you want? Determine what resources you ALREADY have that will help you (knowledge, people, time, money, psycho-physiological states such as confidence, and so on). Consider additional resources you'll need to move forward.
6. Check Ecology – How will your outcome impact others, positively or negatively? Will this outcome have any unintended consequences, either negative or positive?
7. What specific steps will you need to take to achieve your goal – what is your plan? Identify manageable steps to help achieve your result, consider multiple options to get where you want to go, and determine the FIRST step you'll take.
8. Future Pace – Create a strong internal representation of you having already achieved your goal:

Vision – What do you see? Create a mental "movie" of yourself achieving your goal, running it from start to end. Make sure that the movie is as vivid and accurate as possible.

Sound – What do you hear? What will you be saying to yourself? What will others be saying to you? Incorporate this into your mental movie.

Feelings – What do you feel? What are the physical sensations of having achieved your goal, and what positive emotions are you experiencing?

Doing this process wholeheartedly and writing it down will help you set a goal and reach it!

INSPIRATION

I WONDER IF YOU KNOW

I wonder if you know,

the work your body has done today.

And every day.

How much disease it has fought off.

How many times it could have failed but battled on,

how many ways it could have broken but did not.

I wonder if you know,

the work your body has done today.

And every day.

And each day it has done this amazing job,

without your help,

without your approval,

your acceptance,

your kindness.

Each day it has soldiered on,

regardless of the constant stream of negativity,

pulsing its way from your brain to your cells.

Not good enough.

Not attractive enough.

Not the right shape.

Perhaps it’s time to see your body for what it truly is,

An amazing and mind-blowingly competent machine.

To get your soul to where it needs to be in this life.

To let you live.

I wonder if you know,

how much better you would be as a team.

I wonder.

- Donna Ashworth

From ‘I Wish I Knew’: https://amzn.to/3JVMJlZ

UPCOMING EVENTS

Fellow Goddesses! Get clear and make a plan for aging powerfully, passionately, and purposefully! You can do it, and I will guide you in a fun and fulfilling way without filling your journey with activities you don’t like.

It will be designed with YOU in 3 months for only $720 (a 70% discount)! Why am I offering such a gigantic discount? I need to test the Pilot for my Transform the Way You Age Group Program, and I need your feedback. This offer is limited, so schedule a Discovery Session at https://tarufisher.coachesconsole.com/calendar right away.

Thanks so much for taking the time to read my Newsletter! Feel free to share it with any woman you think would benefit from reading it. And they can receive my 10 Tips for Powerful Aging by clicking http://bit.ly/3XeX6IK